My joy is worth healing for.
Last week, I experienced one of the best moments of my life. Alone. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. That experience taught me that I, alone, have the power to create a life that keeps me on a Natural High. In fact, I have the responsibility to create that life. And to do the work it requires to maintain it.
If the insecure and shy girl of my youth knew that I would one day stand confidently on a stage, shining bright, and seeking judgement…she would be amazed. And proud of the transformation she never believed could take place.
It took a great deal of (self) reflection, (self) acceptance, (self) forgiveness and (self) appreciation to get here. However, once I realized that I am enough and complete by myself. I learned how to create joy for myself. I began to invest in experiences that put me in position to feel the Natural Highs that I deserve. Experiences that others didn’t give to me – and therefore, others could never take away from me. That power…and responsibility…belongs solely to me.
For a long time I allowed the fear of being alone to make me addicted to superficial highs. Or exhilarating moments that I could only experience from being in connection to someone else. Fear stole my power. And gave another person the responsibility to create my joy. In the words of some wise soul…”make it make sense”.
At the start of my Forty-Fifth year of life, I’m grateful to finally be in a season of freedom. Released from the grips of that fear. Drenched in the recognition of my value and the willingness to enforce my worth.
And while it feels amazing to have others see my worth. I don’t grant anyone else the authority to validate my value. By doing so I grant them the ability to control the frequency of my highs. And I enjoy my power, my freedom, too much to allow that to happen.
In closing, this is what I now know to be true. It takes courage to enter challenging experiences armed only with a commitment to do my best. However, that courage and commitment are all that I need to make sure that I leave those same challenging experiences…on a Natural High.
The world needs us to show up in any space, on any stage, covered in confidence, value, and power. And I stand ready to fulfill that need. And so should you.